Without A Valentine

He sat upon his bed, smiling absently at the photo he held in his hands. Boy, she looked beautiful. And that smile of hers - he could never get sick of that smile. He loved her. It was a love he couldn't explain. He loved everything about her. Every conversation they'd had together, he remembered. And yet he still couldn't express those feelings. Not to anyone. It was hard enough accepting them himself. Who knew where she was now. Asleep, maybe. Dreaming. Happy. Happy enough without him in her life.

He sighed, staring transfixed into her open eyes. His heart melted. Those were the eyes he wanted to see every morning. But it would never happen. His smile faded as he put the photo down and looked distractedly around his room. He could have everything he wanted, but it would be nothing without someone to love. He looked back down at the bed, away from the photograph, to find himself staring at a scrunched up piece of paper. He unraveled it, and began to read the letter he'd written. It was good, he had to admit that. But not good enough. He wasn't sure if it would ever be good enough.

He scrunched it into a ball again, aiming it across the room and scoring it into the bin. He then took the photo in his hands, and hid it inside the back cover of the book he was reading. He then got to his feet, and slouched down into the chair in front of the computer. She was online, as usual. He sighed, knowing that for another year, they'd both be without valentines. But that was okay with him. He'd never known it any other way. And as much as he might've liked to ask that one question, it would not be coming from him. If she really wanted it that way, she would ask. He smiled at her MSN name. Just the name was enough to make him smile. And he signed out. It killed to go without conversation, but there had to be some boundaries. Afterall, he couldn't talk to her every day... as much as he would like to.

[363 words]